Stupid's Cries
There
was once a little boy, and his mother sent him to buy a sheep's head
and pluck; afraid he should forget it, the lad kept saying all the way
along:
"Sheep's head and pluck! Sheep's head and pluck!" Trudging
along, he came to a stile; but in getting over he fell and hurt
himself, and beginning to blubber, forgot what he was sent for. So he
stood a little while to consider: at last he thought he recollected it,
and began to repeat:
"Liver and lights and gall and all! Liver and lights and gall and all!" Away he went again, and came to where a man had a pain in his liver, bawling out:
"Liver and lights and gall and all! Liver and lights and gall and all!" Whereon the man laid hold of him and beat him, bidding him say:
"Pray God send no more! Pray God send no more!" The youngster strode along, uttering these words, till he reached a field where a hind was sowing wheat:
"Pray God send no more! Pray God send no more!" This was all his cry. So the sower began to thrash him, and charged him to repeat:
"Pray God send plenty more! Pray God send plenty more!" Off the child scampered with these words in his mouth till he reached a churchyard and met a funeral, but he went on with his:
"Pray God send plenty more! Pray God send plenty more!" The chief mourner seized and punished him, and bade him repeat:
"Pray God send the soul to heaven! Pray God send the soul to heaven!" Away went the boy, and met a dog and a cat going to be hung, but his cry rang out:
"Pray God send the soul to heaven! Pray God send the soul to heaven!" The good folk nearly were furious, seized and struck him, charging him to say:
"A dog and a cat agoing to be hung! A dog and a cat agoing to be hung!" This the poor fellow did, till he overtook a man and a woman going to be married. "Oh! oh!" he shouted:
"A dog and a cat agoing to be hung! A dog and a cat agoing to be hung!" The man was enraged, as we may well think, gave him many a thump, and ordered him to repeat:
"I wish you much joy! I wish you much joy!" This he did, jogging along, till he came to two labourers who had fallen into a ditch. The lad kept bawling out:
"I wish you much joy! I wish you much joy!" This vexed one of the folk so sorely that he used all his strength, scrambled out, beat the crier, and told him to say.
"The one is out, I wish the other was! The one is out, I wish the other was!" On went young 'un till he found a fellow with only one eye; but he kept up his song:
"The one is out, I wish the other was! The one is out, I wish the other was!" This was too much for Master One-eye, who grabbed him and chastised him, bidding him call:
"The one side gives good light, I wish the other did! The one side gives good light, I wish the other did!" So
he did, to be sure, till he came to a house, one side of which was on
fire. The people here thought it was he who had set the place
a-blazing, and straightway put him in prison. The end was, the judge
put on his black cap, and condemned him to die.
| All English Fairy Tales
THE STORY OF THE THREE LITTLE PIGS
JACK AND THE BEANSTALK
JACK THE GIANT-KILLER
THE PIED PIPER OF FRANCHVILLE
THE STORY OF THE THREE BEARS
TOM TIT TOT
THE THREE SILLIES
THE ROSE-TREE
THE OLD WOMAN AND HER PIG
HOW JACK WENT TO SEEK HIS FORTUNE
MR. VINEGAR
NIX NOUGHT NOTHING
JACK HANNAFORD
BINNORIE
MOUSE AND MOUSER
CAP O' RUSHES
TEENY-TINY
THE MASTER AND HIS PUPIL
TITTY MOUSE ND TATTY MOUSE
JACK AND HIS GOLDEN SNUFF-BOX
HENNY-PENNY
CHILDE ROWLAND
MOLLY WHUPPIE
THE RED ETTIN
MASTER OF ALL MASTERS.
THE GOLDEN ARM
THE HISTORY OF TOM THUMB
MR. FOX
LAZY JACK
JOHNNY-CAKE
EARL MAR'S DAUGHTER
MR. MIACCA
WHITTINGTON AND HIS CAT
THE STRANGE VISITOR
THE LAIDLY WORM OF SPINDLESTON HEUGH
THE CAT AND THE MOUSE.
THE FISH AND THE RING.
THE MAGPIE'S NEST
KATE CRACKERNUTS
THE CAULD LAD OF HILTON
THE ASS, THE TABLE, AND THE STICK
FAIRY OINTMENT
THE WELL OF THE WORLD'S END.
THE THREE HEADS OF THE WELL |